rants of a bittersweet

people of the Philippines, this is my call against two absurd phenomena: the unlimited fad and the song and dance craze in the commercials.

1. celebRATE

when Globe telecoms thought of this idea (or rather, copied this idea from Sun…) im sure their purposes are: (1) to generate more income (capitalism of course..), and (2) to stop losing more and more subscribers who are throwing off their globe sim cards in exchange for a Sun (especially those who are in a relationship… thus the term "may ka-Sun").

sadly though, what they failed to predict is how the Filipino people would take this. and personally speaking, i’m a victim of how this phenomenon was abused.

last thursday, around 5.30am, i woke up and found out that i have 12 messages on my mobile. feeling flattered that so many people remembered my while i was sleeping, i excitedly opened my inbox only to find that… *tada!* they’re all from one person! and that person has been pestering me and other globe subs with forwared passe quotes for like every hour since the start of that freaking unlimited promo. grrrreeaaattt!!!!

and then yesterday, i recieved a text from someone that simply said, "tapos na exams ko, unli na ulit ako. yehey!" can i just say, "like i care?!"

what i fail to understand is why there are such people who would throw off their money over something like this thinking that they have actually saved but in reality they’re just really throwing it off given how they make use of it. period.

don’t get me wrong though, i have nothing against remembering other people. but the thing is, i still believe that there is such a line (and its not a thin one) between remembering and pestering. and when the situation is like what i have mentioned above, ITS NOTHING BUT PESTERING!!

Hay, i think that concept paper of Dr. Lacson on Filipino Communicative Behavior really has a strong basis for research. reminds me of that sayang at libre…

2. the song and dance craze on commercials

if i remember correctly, it was Rejoice shampoo who pioneered the idea of using this gimik for marketing and advertising purposes. and though i don’t know this for a fact, i have a strong feeling this gimik gave a positive effect — as almost everyone sings and dances the "sumusunod sa galaw mo" jingle of the Jaboom twins.

as if its not yet enough, nagkaron pa ng bago after it. at nag-sunuran pa ang ibang brands from antacids to car battery to condiments. and what’s worse, nakaka-LSS!! kahit ayaw mo! asar!!! (that Datu Puti and Vinegar commercial, for me, is what’s toping the list of the MOST IRRITATING commercial on earth).

aaaaarrgh!!!! i am so fed up! ~x(

How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days is a feel good movie right? then how come my friend and i didn’t feel good after watching it?

ever since dianne and i found a soul sister in each other’s existence, i noticed that we never stopped doing the following until the wee hours of the morning:

    - questioning things and/or deconstructing ideals
    - feeling bad about what’s unfair and what we can’t seem to comprehend
    - wondering about circumstances that has or has not materialized, and
    - analyzing our selves and actions against other peoples’ among others

and since a feel good movie as that of Hudson’s and McConaughey’s is not without loopholes, we ended up feeling like discussing it (at 1 in the morning) — the focus not on its mise-en-scene, but rather on its naive story.

    "ang unfair", dianne said.

    "oo nga", i replied.

    *sighs*

and that’s where the discussion begins. kasi naman, why do stories have to be so impossible? call us sourpusses or something but, i mean, who could fall in real love in ten 10 days?! *getouttahere!*

also, this kind of depictions help build the arguments for love being a social construct… as i see it, since love is a concept so abstract and subjective it becomes so vulnerable to abuse and misconceptions. and this is what is being done by the ones in power — those holding the ideological apparatus (such as media). which is bad.

*oops, am i turning into a Marxist here?*

hay nako, i guess we’re just getting older…

*sighs again*

ang lahat ng ito ay natutunan ko kila bevs at joyce at rai habang nasa bomica… pero feeling ko ang categories na ito ay hindi pa exhaustive. so let’s add some more to these!

hipon - kain katawan, tapon ulo

pusit - kain lahat

ipis - tapon lahat

example: si Vladimir ay hipon, si De Buvois ay feeling ko pusit, at yung stalker ni aiza ay walang iba kundi ipis! (bwuahahahaah!!!)

Speaking of De Buvois (pronounced as: du-bu-vwa. actually di ako sure sa spelling kaya Josh na nga lang!), it turns out na siya pla ang misteryosong wednesday na hinahanap-hanap ni bevs ever since that, uhm, wednesday na nakita niya siya sa Film Center *toink!*. pero bago ang spill, ganito kasi un…

Thursday, 10 am. nasa UP si bevs, nasa Laguna ako:

bevs: Fwend, nakita ko si wednesday d2 sa casaa! Pauwi na sana ako pero napatengga pa tuloy ako

for some unexplainable reasons, biglang pumasok sa isip ko ang pagmumukha ni Josh, na somehow nakilala ko through a friend, nung nabasa ko text niya. i dont know why but it just did. and mind you, hindi ako kasama ni bevs nung araw na nahiwagaan siya sa pagkato nito sa Film Center na under debate pa kung tga-UP nga ba o nagkukubli lang na UP student pero Atenista. Half French kasi. anyway, reply naman ako ng ganito…

pam: tlga?! for that, tengga day at hour mo na yan sa casaa! haha ;-o im so happy for you friend

later that day… habang nasa ikot galing Alumni Hostel papuntang bomica. nasa may tapat na ng gym nang may sumakay sa harap at biglang…

bevs: frend, si wednesday!

pam: huh?

bevs: si wednesday, nasa harapan!

pam: un?!!!! e kilala ko un e!

at simula nun nagka-information overload na si bevs courtesy of your truly ;;) … hay, buti pa ang misteryo mo na-solve na…

kaya Thursday, maki-sama ka naman! magpakita ka na ulit…

Your heart is not open so I must go
The spell has been broken, I loved you so
Freedom comes when you learn to let go
Creation comes when you learn to say no

You were my lesson I had to learn
I was your fortress you had to burn
Pain is a warning that something’s wrong
I pray to God that it won’t be long
Do ya wanna go higher?

There’s nothing left to try
There’s no place left to hide
There’s no greater power
Than the power of good-bye

Your heart is not open so I must go
The spell has been broken, I loved you so
You were my lesson I had to learn
I was your fortress

There’s nothing left to lose
There’s no more heart to bruise
There’s no greater power
Than the power of good-bye

Learn to say good-bye
I yearn to say good-bye

*special thanks to sir lejano for accidentally playing the mtv of this madonna song in our class.

Totoo ngang we’re all connected in some ways we may not know at first.

For the benefit of all the fans of my blog (yes, I am being assuming that there are some out there. Dianne for one), the one I’m talking about right now is not the one I wrote about two days ago.  Actually, this one’s last sem pa. no, make it last last sem pa since it started during nat.sci 2 days where we’re classmates (2 seats apart and an aisle at the second to the last row to be more exact).

Tapos last sem, I was surprised to find that your classroom is next to mine, though I don’t know for sure if we’re of the same time slot or magkasunod.  PE pa un of all subjects.

And then on that very odd day, I found you at the same stop where I was waiting for a ride (nauna ko dun!  So it was not a controlled thing by me.  Ewan ko sa nalang kanya :-p).  Seems like our paths were very much intertwined then huh?  And I thought last sem was the end of it, but no, may ‘one time big time pa pala’.

So… that’s your name.  It took a year para mawala ka sa category na ‘nameless and often seen faces’ (hehe).  And it turns out that you’re a friend of a long-time friend pa pala. Hay… nice meeting you nalang.  Virtually and in one-way sort that is.

Yun kayang isa, ano naman kayang mangyayari dun?

Ponder on this:

 
“We can never know what to want, because,
living only one life, we can neither compare it with our previous lives nor
perfect it in our lives to come.

There is no means of testing which decision
is better, because there is no basis for comparison. We live everything as it
comes, without warning, like an actor going on cold. And what can life be worth
if the first rehearsal for life is life itself? That is why life is always like
a sketch. No “sketch is quite the word, because a sketch is an outline of
something, the groundwork for a picture, whereas the sketch that is our life is
a sketch for nothing, an outline with no picture.

Einmal is keinmal. What happens but once, says the German adage,
might as well not have happened at all. If we only have one life to live, we
might as well not have lived at all.”

                                                                                                               – excerpt from Milan Kundera’s The unbearable lightness of being

hi. kamusta ka na kaya? sana nasa mabuti kang kalagayan (wehehe). alam mo mukha kang familiar, though di ko alam kung bakit. actually, alam mo yung feeling na parang kilala na kita or something? ganun nung nakita kita! pero pano naman yun eh 100% sure naman akong di kita naging classmate ever. di ka rin naman kapatid o barkada ng isa sa boardmates ko o blockmates o friends. i’m also certain na hindi ka masscomm student. neighbors ba tayo sa KNL Heights? magkatabi ba ng tambayan orgs natin? ano sa tingin mo?

oo nga pla, anong name mo? course? year? may class ka ba sa FC or CAL NB, or AS ng 4-5:30 ng MTh kaya dun ka sa may NISMED sumakay ng ikot nung panahong naka-sabay kita? baka naman tumambay ka lang sa org or frat mo.. or may dinaanan.

eh san ka nga ba papunta nung sumakay ka ng ikot? pauwi ka na ba? ako oo. nauna akong bumaba sayo eh kaya wala tuloy akong idea. haaayy.. lam mo ba, sabi nung mga boardmates ko dapat sinundan daw kita, kaso di ko kayang mag-stalk e. lam mo naman, dalagang filipina ako (ay di mo nga pala alam. well at least alam mo na ngayon. ehehe).

pero wait, na-feel mo din ba na parang familiar ako sayo? wala lang, kase nahuhuli kitang tumitingin (wooohooo!! :-p).

anyways, ingat na lang lagi. relatively maliit naman ang UP Diliman diba? at konti lang ang ikot… pag nagkita tayo ulit o nagkasabay sa jeep sana batiin mo ko kasi knowing me, di mag-iinitiate ng first move. ang arte noh? well, that’s me, pasensiya na…

hmmm… bakit nga kaya mukha at feeling familiar ka sakin?

*ganito kaya ang feeling ni Ria dun sa hinahanap niyang Destiny na once lang niya nakita at nung enrolment pa? how about you bevs, kamusta naman si Mr. Wednesday na ala-Kim Bouk Shiek (kasi same lang yung suot niya nung nakita mo siya sa free screening ng Beautiful Boxer at a week after sa labas ng CASAA. hehe)?

some things i just can’t get over with:

- that there exist 7 types of gender in this day and age. yes, SEVEN na daw!!
- there’s an increasing number of GAYS with BOYFRIENDS and even GUY EX’s
- a former MALE kickboxer is now a sexy FEMALE — WITH A BOYFRIEND (what money and science can do… watch the Beautiful Boxer.)
- according to a Socio prof., women should not so much count on having boyfriends/husband somewhere in time, as there are more females than males nowadays. and gays WITH boyfriends by the way. so that means, konti mas konti na nga ang lalaki, sila-sila pa. ano ba?!
- an orgmate once mentioned that SHE sometimes hate being with our gay orgmate, dahil mas tinitingnan pa un kaysa sa kanya na babae. by the way, that gay orgmate of ours have a boyfriend. argh!!!!
- love is just a social construct lang daw. sniff sniff for hopeless romantics..

On an entirely different note…
- si Carlito, sumali ng UP REP!! huwwwwattt tlga!!!

this entry is a big no-no for people with short span of attention. this one’s too delayed, as many things have already happened — and the things i wanna write about got accumulated.

huh?!
2006… i can’t believe that only 5 days ago i was living in a different world where everything seems to be so far away. acads and other matters that’s usually and constantly on my mind seemed to be non-existing concepts last week. in short, the different surroundings, language, and faces among all others have somehow liberated me… but only for a while, as the things that i have temporarily ran away from came crashing back like an avalanche as soon as i stepped out of the plane.

of that trip…
Singapore is a nice country. i never thought that there could exist such a place where:
    - there’s NO heavy traffic (and cars are not tinted, for security purposes i think. and its strictly only 4 passengers and a driver in one car. shit, kung dun kami nakatira eh di laging 2 car..)
    - no bystanders, as everyone has a job. in effect, less probability of being snatched or being a victim of a crime.
    - no stray animals. in effect, there’s no probability for one to accidentally step on a shit..
    - everything’s organized and efficient and planned and clean
    - buildings are connected under, so ilalim pa lang ng mga building pwede nang pasyalan. anyway, its air-conditioned so no problem.
    - no squatters!!!! no beggars!!!
    - having houses with an actual lot is a sheer luxury. and only super rich can manage to live on one. its mostly condos and buildings that they call HDB (i dont know the meaning of this)
    - there are mercedes benz taxis (yup! no less than the classy car… whew!), and drivers actually give you your change.
    - notices are translated in 3 to 4 languages. my train rides are quite an experience, (except for the smell of the chekwas* and the panas* who are not so fond of the concept of taking a bath evryday..), as you can actually hear people speak in different languages!
    - almost, if not all, buildings are mall (yep! on my second day, nasusuka na ko pag nakakakita ako ng mall… take note, second day pa lang un.)
    - every place is accessible by train.
    - public places such as CR (its ‘toilet’ to them, by the way) and waiting sheds, and public transportations are not filled with vandalisms.
    - there are not so many people, as they are not so populated given that their people has other more important and productive things to do than to make a baby that cannot be decently supported. harhar.
    - there are no billboards, or if there are, nakadikit sa building. and its electronic.
    - there’s a mall that’s open 24 hours (which is the Mustafa Mall, also known as the little India. They say its cheaper here, but i haven’t noticed as im tired of multiplying every price by 33… The only downside though, is the smell. we went there around 12am na and those panas still smell terribly. don’t they ever take a bath? mainit na nga dun, ganun pa sila. na-lolost tuloy un intricate traditional dresses that they wear on a regular basis…)

despite of it all, i can still say that  Philippines is still a more lovable place than Singapore (mind you, i am not joking here or being sarcastic. pero cge, lets just say that we scrap the government factor in saying this). true, their land is better in a sense that they have intellegently made of use of their very meager resources wisely and thus, have a kick-ass island city that is oh-so-prosperous and peaceful (in short, conducive for investors and in turn, a booming economy lang naman). but then again, you can tend to feel that eveything is so technical and superficial. while everything is so beautiful, hindi naman totoo (e.g., the Siloso beach located in Sentosa, a place they call beach, is so obviously man-made lang and that the sand, i believe, is imported from our country. ni wala ngang panama ung ‘beach’ nila sa puerto e.. and im making an overstatement by comparing that ‘beach’ to our puerto galera pa. hehe).

being there makes me realize that our land has loads of potentials, only wasted or enjoyed by the ruling class most of the time. tsk tsk. maybe all we need to do is to wake up and start caring genuinely to our country, but that alone is a heavy thing to do and a very hard thing to ask to all of 85 million Filipinos…

aaaargh!! this is soooo frustrating!!

*just ask me what are these. its a kinda code. don’t wanna risk my self and the, uh, international relations, as the sentences where these are mentioned is not so flattering. haha!

of some sociological concepts…
anomie - yes, i am once again using this sociological concept. thank God for introducing it to me, as I (and my blockmates) now have an explanation for some unexplainable and on-the-spur emotions or mood swings that we feel.

definition of the situation (d.o.s.) - i just learned about it today, and its somehow related to constructivism (ever since i’ve learned about this, nagulo na ang mundo ko. i gave so much leeway to everyone, everything..) very interesting. tama nga naman… if only its simple to get the other’s d.o.s… but its not, and most of the time dinadaan na lang sa silence at pakiramdaman but that doesn’t really solve it. in fact, silence makes the situation vaguer up to a point na nahahayaan na lang na ganun until the persons involve just fade away at hindi na maibabalik un dati.. it has got something to do with pride, and we all darn have it. tsk tsk..

stages of death - denial, anger, bargaining, resignation, depression, and acceptance… these are the stages of death, but i say that it is also applicable in other events or stages in our life. i can attest to it.

2006
"yung oras, hindi siya sakin…"

this is one of the remarkable words that my dear blockmate said on our first meeting for this year. naghihinga siya samin ng sama ng loob with the supposedly good things that are happening to both her and her boyfriend but the thing is, those good things are tearing them apart. she would be leaving this february to avail of the 5-month scholarship to South Korea that the Comm.Research department has offered. she’ll be back in june but come july, ung boyfriend naman niya ang aalis,mag-mmigrate to australia… she cried to us, and i feel for her. her words also strike me in a sense that i have realized that yeah, we really have no control over things — time especially — and that sometimes all we can do is to succumb to the flow coz there’s really nothing else to do. we are weaker compared to it, no matter how much we planned everything.

one moment you’re happy, the next you’re crying…. this is one of the things that i have realized before the former year ends. everything is so unpredictable, and reasons for why things happen are harder to see.

am hearing: hard to believe and spoliarium by Eraserheads