rants of a bittersweet

PREAMBLE:

We, the UP Communication Research majors, in order to pass all the subjects we enrolled in this semester, to be able to get the required subjects for next semester, to finish college in due time, and to commit ourselves to a bright and promising* future, do ordain and promulgate this not-to-do list on these cyclical harassed times in our lives.

THE NOT-TO-DO LIST:

1. not to sleep early

2. not to wake up late

3. not to forget to eat meals

4. not to lose patience and sanity

5. not to be suicidal (wag tumawid sa commonwealth ave hoping na masagasaan nalang ng rumaragasang 10-wheeler truck, o magpakalat-kalat anywhere near the lagoon pag umuulan)

6. not to forget to take a breather when everything becomes too overwhelming (!!!!!!!!)

7. not to lose sense of time and date (remember the deadlines. always)

8. not to waste time (errrr…. :-I)

9. not to forget that our professors are great critics (they want our best. all of them)

10. not to ran out of logic and creativity

11. not to vent it all out on innocent persons around us

12. not to turn ourselves into robots, no matter how bad our circumstances calls for it

13. not to lose sight of the ‘light at the end of the tunnel’

SO HELP US GOD.

*quoted from one of Sir Jorda’s "makata" moments in MEDIA LAW class (yup, you just saw the words "makata" and "media law" in a same sentence)

(he? it?) must be the most accurate virtual quack in the world! good thing we came across this, uh, game one rainy afternoon when we absolutely have nothing to do* aside from doing ‘regular critique’ on our favorite persons in the world. saved us from boredom (and commiting sin :-p), it did (^_^)

to have fun, all you have to do is type in a question that is answerable by yes or no and voila! laugh your hearts out!:-D

it worked for me and my friend (unfortunately for her though…hehehe)!

P.S. this is not a paid advertisement

*actually there’s a CRes130 paper that we need to take care of at that time but well, we’re not in the mood so there goes…

so… we’re officially two family members short.

this realization hit me when i arrived yesterday from diliman. i wasn’t able to personally wish my sister luck at the airport coz i have a class. also, i heard that the car was so full of her things anyway that they could barely squeeze in. so even if i went home last friday, i still wouldn’t be able to tag along.

that sister of mine is the second in our family to leave. the first one was our eldest sister, who left march last year. they are now living together in Singapore, earning (and would earn) amounts that could only be achieved through imagination here in our country. great, that’s what they are –being able to reach those heights in their careers at such an early age. and i have to say that i’m so proud of them.

however, this situation wherein a member of one’s family had to leave for work is not unique to us alone. i know a handful of people who have the same experience.

why this has to happen?

look around, listen to the news… what do we see? additional taxes, fare and oil price increase, blah blah. everything seems to increase but the salary of the workers. sometimes i felt guilty for just being alive, for simply being a dependent. and so i often dream of the day when i can finally contribute. life in this country is soooo freaking hard. add the fact that we have shameless politicians who thinks of nothing but their wrenched political careers in making choices for this country (i sincerely hope that karma gets you all).

so can you blame people for leaving? i, for one, cannot. they have to find a way in order to attain a decent living, and that’s not exactly illegal, right? but what’s sad is that for every bright and promising filipino we send abroad, we lose. the loss may not readily manifest the moment they board their respective planes, but i’m sure it inevitably would in the near future.

it was a relatively pleasant saturday morning. all smiles, i was. in other words, i thought it was going to be a fine day worth remembering.

but i was wrong. so.

first: i should have viewed the non-existence of globe signal in UP Masscom as a cue for me to just turn off my phone. wala rin namang pagkakaiba eh. i waited for nothing and gave excuses for everything. but nothing happened. at the end of the day, i just wanna spank myself for being so… so _____ (i dont know what to call me, please supply any negative word. thanks :-/). when i told my friend about it, he said that what that person did deserves an unforgiveable curse (if only we live in a magical world…).

second: i thought there’s one (or should i say two) less lonely people in the world given the latest developments in their, uhm, pseudo-****life. but guess what? im wrong. again. there seems to be a problem somewhere. i hope they would be able to sort it out.

third: happened last wednesday, was informed on friday then updated just a while ago. its a serious one. a good friend of mine is under an unthinkable situation (no, she’s not pregnant. duh). she needs our prayers and support for her dad. i dont know how i would carry it had it happened to me…friend, i do hope that everything’s gonna be all right. God will help him.

my oh my… ang gulo ng mundo noh? paki-ayos mo nga! :-p

so this is it. my blog. my first entry. im finally sparing the friendster bulletin as the venue for all my angst.

and what could possibly prompt me to do this stuff? negative feelings and depression of course. these are best motivation in this whole mean world… i guess.

actually, i dont know where to start. there’s just so many things on my mind. but let me say, this negativity was triggered by only one person. great is he therefore. (oops, a clue there…)

mind you this is not about a break-up or some relationship-gone-bad stuffs. no, it simply couldn’t be coz i haven’t even been involved in one. ever.

so what am i talking about? let’s just say that its complicated. that i dont know if i even have the right to feel this way. that i’m so hating the situation. im always hoping for the best of things to happen to me, but fate has got some tricks up to its sleeve… and its not exactly what i have in mind

as of now, only one person could make sense out of this seemingly pointless blog entry (two, if the person who caused this negativity in me can figure it out). and i do hope that he doesn’t tell a soul. at least not now.

i look forward to day when everything’s finally in the right place… help me God